5 ways to start loving yourself the way you deserve to be loved

We live in the age of constant communication and constant demand for our psyche. The age of infinite information and social media, where the life of people we don't even know is put in front of our eyes and creeps into our minds. There is the constant feedback that we are not enough, that there is more to do every day, there is more to achieve, the new health trend, another way to look even more beautiful, to perform better at work, to earn more, and the list keeps going.

It's a beautiful time we are in, the access to information that maybe our parents didn't have, the possibilities that are now open to each and every one of us to connect, to have an impact and to grow on a scale that wasn't possible before the internet. With all these expectations, some self-imposed, others imposed by our family, co-workers, and social influencers, when are we allowed to feel that what we are in this very moment as imperfect and as flawed as it is, deserves to feel loved? How can we show ourselves that not only we deserve love, but we deserve to be loved the way we want to?

Love can be a vague and misinterpreted concept, constructed from the media we consume, the movies, the pieces of music, the books, and the quotes, people around us. But what does it mean to you? how do you feel loved? Let's look at a few ways we can start to connect to ourself and find out what love feels like and what it means to us as an individual.

1. Accepting our uniqueness. There are 7.5 billion ways to live a life and you are the only one who knows how to live yours. Not your partner, parents, your friends, your dog or anyone in between. Everybody is just as confused as you are about what all this is meant to be, what life is. philosopher's have been pondering the questions for centuries and if there was an answer that would fit everyone, we would all have it. Once you accept that you are with all strengths and weaknesses, all your day to day struggles, less than perfect behaviours is just you being a human, like anyone else. Then you begin to extend the love that you might have for people you care about to yourself too. When you see that as high as your expectations are for yourself, as high as your ambitions are for your life, you still hurt like anyone else, and you still want to feel good just like anyone else, you can stop comparing yourself to others and start accepting yourself today with love.

2. Accepting Here and & Now. The only way you can move to where you want to is to accept where you are right here and now. This means all parts of you, the parts you like and more importantly the parts that you are not so pleased with. If you don't accept your insecurities, your flaws and your human-ness right now, there is no way you can work on them or find a way to compensate for them. Start with who you are right now.

3. Begin with the Future-self. This might sound like a contradiction to the point above, but hear me out. Our brain cannot tell the difference between our imagination and reality. In fact, there isn't such a thing as reality, there is only our perception of reality. This point is about using our mind's amazing ability to believe to go beyond what is rational. This is exactly how most of our inventions have come to life. They started from an image in someone's mind, something that didn't match the current reality at the time, but eventually became just as real as anything else. To put this ability in use, see your future-self, the one that is already happy and loved the way you deserve, and see from the eye of your future-self, feel from the body of your future-self. See yourself as already having and being all you are and feel the love you have for yourself and bring it to your present moment.

4. Mindfulness-Meditation. There is enough research around the impact of meditation on well-being that even the most sceptic can't argue against it. Here is what you might not know about mindfulness meditation: the more you are present to your thoughts and feelings, especially the negative and unhelpful ones, the less impact and weight they have on your mood. This means the routine everyday thoughts that put you in a bad mood or make you think and feel you don't deserve love, lose their power over you the more present you are to them.

5. Rest. We tend to underestimate the importance of rest in our busy lives. From a physiological standpoint, most of our body's recovery happens while we are at rest. Whether this rest is a meditation break, a nap, getting a massage, or sleep, they all serve an essential function to our wellbeing. REM and deep sleep are essential for memory formation, resolving and dissolving emotional challenges of the day, and creating a sense of meaning out of the events of the day. It is in sleep that our physical body recovers from the strain and the stress it has gone under. Taking care of the machine that drives our life, just the same way you put your phone to get charged is a core action in being more loving to yourself. Rest well

#selfacceptance #lifestyle